Keeping it Real

July 11, 2011

Just a glance at our family and you know part of our story. There's no hiding the fact that we're an adoptive family. And we wouldn't want to hide it! It was most certainly God's plan for our lives and every day we feel blessed and proud of who we are.

Over the years we've had our fair share of questions and comments from strangers, and with only a few exceptions, all have been positive exchanges . . . in fact, we welcome and enjoy appropriate interaction from those who are interested in our family's story.

You could say that I've had quite a bit of practice in this arena of conversation, and have given the subject quite a bit of thought. Even more so in recent years as Adrienne has grown older and we adopted Anna Kathryn.

 I learned recently that it helps to think ahead.

A few months ago, while enjoying bagels with my girls at Panera, we were approached by a spunky older woman.  Anna Kathryn was seated to my right, and Adrienne sat across from me. Ironically, this was the second time she'd seen us at Panera and had come over to our booth to chat. The first time she overstepped a bit with her questions and comments, bothering Adrienne. So the second time I was prepared.

"Excuse me," she questioned, "But are these your daughters?"

I smiled tightly and replied yes. "You adopted them?" she asked. I nodded.

She launched into her own story . . . the relative with children adopted from Korea . . . as I nodded and smiled, then politely jumped in and reminded her that we'd talked before, that I remembered what she was sharing with me. "And are your girls from . . . China?" she inquired, moving on. Again, I said yes. And grinned across the table at Adrienne, signaling that I was doing my best to wrap up quickly. 

Then came the question. "ARE THEY SISTERS?" she asked loudly. Remember, I've had practice. I'd thought ahead.

"Yes," I said brightly. Knowing something about Chinese adoption she paused, looked at the girls, not satisfied with my answer. She shifted her weight, turning slightly so as to face me directly, "No . . . I mean, are they REAL sisters?" 

July 11, 2012

"Yes," I said firmly. "They are real sisters." And I just kept smiling at Adrienne until the woman realized that the conversation was over and walked away.